I'veBeenLookingForYou

I’ve been looking for you.
Inside the glory of rejection
And the desolation of acceptance
When neither of us knew what we wanted.

I’ve looked for you
In the rock bottoms of hearts
And dried up wishing wells
Tracing the arcs of good intentions
Over tidal waves.

I think I’ve seen you hiding
In empty confessionals
Blank text messages
And in the crooked smiles and awkward hellos
Of people I’ve never really talked to.

I’m pretty sure I’ve heard you
Composing an orchestra in my chest
To a chorus of words of wisdom
I’ve heard but never listened to.

I’ve looked for you
In shadows dancing in the dark
And lightning crashing in the sun
Until I could no longer tell the difference.

I might have spoken to you before.
In broken prayers
And stories that cut our conversations short
With the jagged fragments of sentences
Until we stammered and stuttered
Into blissful embrace of silence.

But I think I’ve found you.
In the metal magazines I keep
Tucked away inside mechanical pencils
And the blood of ballpoints
Until the time I was ready.
Ready to love you enough to origami your lined paper heart
Into a masterpiece.